Show Me a Sign
- Jan 4
- 3 min read
"Ask the Lord your God for a sign,
whether in the deepest depths or in the highest heights."
~ Isaiah 7:11
God has given us plenty of signs of his love for us - most notably, the gift of his son, Jesus, through whom we have eternal life. We have no need of another sign of God's presence; nonetheless, he leaves proof of himself and his love for creation all around us. Thanks be to God!
We are not always aware of these signs, especially when we are distracted by earthly cares. Grief is an emotion that can truly cloud our vision. The overpowering sadness as we miss the ones we love so deeply, the strong desire to see them again or hold their hands once more, and the questions of whether they can still hear us and see us weigh on our hearts and minds. I was particularly shocked when these questions plagued me after my father died several months ago. I've always been so sure of my faith and I know my dad was steadfast in his, as well. Why the doubts?
Turns out, grief makes no distinction between those of faith and those without. Even the Anglican theologian C.S. Lewis grappled with doubt after his wife died. I gave my doubts over to God because trying to silence them myself was simply overwhelming in the darkness of grief. Little by little, God eased the feeling of heaviness in my chest and I started to live again. My father and I frequently walked a trail near the river. We last did so in April 2025, 3 months before Dad succumbed to vascular dementia. I couldn't bring myself to go to the trail without him. On New Year's Day of 2026, my good friend called me up and asked if I wanted to walk with her on the trail. It was sunny and chilly, not overcast and below freezing as it had been for weeks. I thought of any excuse to stay home and avoid the trail, then realized it was time for me to let go of the sadness and reclaim the wonderful memories I had of me and Dad - all while making beautiful new memories with my friend.
She picked me up shortly thereafter and we walked more than a mile. I talked a lot about what spaces along the trail were meaningful to me because of how Daddy used to enjoy them. My friend took a photo of me on the stump that my father liked to sit on when he got tired. The photo we used for his obituary was of him on that stump. I felt especially close to Daddy as I sat there that day. As my friend and I walked under the bridge, I noticed something in the dead winter brush. It was a leaf that remained from seasons before. The leaf had the shape and color of a heart. I knew God was healing me as I walked with my friend and I knew for certain that Daddy was right there with me, too...loving me, praying for me, watching over me. I was sure Daddy was proud of me for starting to embrace life again...and God was, as well. Jesus did come in order that we might have life to the full.
Doing things I enjoy, having fun with people I love, and letting go of the burden of grief doesn't mean I love or miss my father any less. I will always miss him and I will always love him. Hearing the Statler Brothers will always make me cry because they were Daddy's favorite group and passing a red pickup truck will always warm my heart since his red pickup was his prized possession. But living life to the full will honor my dad, as that is how he lived and how he wanted his family to live. It is how our heavenly Father and Jesus, our savior, want us to live. The Lord will assure us along the way that he is near. May our eyes be always open to see him.
Jesus, thank you for coming to give us abundant life. Help me to live with intention, to look for signs of your loving presence all around me.
If sadness or grief come, may I let them come and then let them go.
Let me live in your love, in the joy and peace that only you can give. Amen.
